All the Single Ladies (and Gentlemen)

I’m single. And I don’t have any intention of getting into another relationship any time soon. This concept is rather strange to some people. Many seem to think that if you’re single, you’re missing out on so many things in life, and that if you don’t get married or live with someone, you’ll die bitter and alone with a wide variety of cats and no one to take care of those cats when you’re gone.

I think being single is preferable to being with the wrong person, or to bouncing from relationship to relationship, getting heartbroken and disappointed.

Relationships, to be perfectly honest, give me more stress than they’re worth. This might be because I haven’t met the right person yet. Or it might be because I’m an introvert, and even minor interactions with other human beings stress me out.

I know there are others who feel the same way; they don’t feel like they’re missing out on anything by not being in a relationship. After all, there are plenty of people who have never been married, and who lead happy and fulfilling lives.

Society and the modern media teach us the wrong impression of love: that romantic relationships are necessary for complete happiness, being celibate is a terrible thing, and that if you’re not in a relationship or looking for one at all times, something must be seriously wrong with you.

My philosophy is that you should be strong enough to stand on your own and be independent. Too many people use a relationship as a crutch. A relationship should enhance your life, not become your life. And the other person should complement you (and compliment you!), not complete you. You should be complete in and of yourself. A lot of love songs today talk about a person that can magically heal you or save you or rescue you. This happens a lot in books and movies, but it’s not the case in real life. You are the only person who can change yourself; others can help you, but they cannot do that hard work for you.

Don’t despair, single people! Take pride in who you are!

9 thoughts on “All the Single Ladies (and Gentlemen)

  1. Too many people use a relationship as a crutch. A relationship should enhance your life, not become your life. And the other person should complement you (and compliment you!), not complete you. You should be complete in and of yourself.

    Well put, very well put. Many many people should have this printed and stuck on the fridge or somewhere, to see it every day. But I think it’s slowly getting better…in the past times it used to be even more bizarre, if you were single.

    Like

  2. One thing I can say for sure is that, in general, the parts of my life when I’ve been in relationships have not been better than when I was single. Not worse, and certainly very different, but not better.

    I try to apply this in my writing, too. My last story, Stevie One, has a teenage girl as a protagonist. She runs away from home and has various adventures, and there’s nary a romance in sight (let alone a triangle) and she’s fine with that. (Actually, the story may be the most romantic thing I’ve ever written, but she’s; not involved in the romantic part.)

    Like

  3. This post is just fantastic. Honestly – from the fabulous title (which made me literally ‘laugh out loud’ to the great message you write about. I’m single and I agree that one should be independent, even if they are in a relationship.

    Like

  4. Wise words, Maggie. Most people seek out relationships because they think that the relationship will make them “happy.” Some will enhance our happiness. Others won’t. But in the end our happiness resides in OUR hands alone.

    Like

Comments are closed.