Gmail Likes to Put Words in My Mouth…

…and weird reminders on my calendar. It annoys me when I’m trying to email my friend and Gmail gives me suggestions of what to say that totally lack in personality and would be offensive if I actually sent them. I know the system is supposed to be intuitive, but have we gotten so lazy that we need to rely on Gmail to write our emails for us?

I know that some tablets and smartphones are actually pretty smart and over time, they learn your most commonly used phrases, so their suggestions actually sound like something you would realistically say. My smartphone has never adapted to my words, so I guess it’s not as smart as it pretends to be.

Another quirk of Gmail: every time someone sends me an email with a sentence that even vaguely seems imperative, Gmail wants me to add it to my calendar.* I got this one yesterday:

madness

You know, it would be really nice if I could believe in whatever latest madness had occurred in the world. I’m naïve, but I’m not that naïve. 🙂

*I don’t use Gmail’s calendar anyway. For work stuff, I use Outlook. For other stuff, I use a paper planner.

Isolation and Interaction

Yesterday, I went to Panera Bread. I like the place because it’s a good haven for a writer. You can sit there and people-watch as you eat your overpriced panini, read, or write, and nobody will think you’re an oddball because nine times out of ten, someone else will be sitting there doing the same thing.

Anyway, in this particular Panera, they rolled out a small kiosk* that lets you order and pay for your meal without talking to a soul. Because I try to avoid talking to people at all costs, I was sorely tempted to use the kiosk, but because I’m supposed to be not avoiding talking to people, I knew I ought to go up to the human cashier instead of the kiosk. But I gave into temptation and used the kiosk, and my order came out just as usual (although it was kind of creepy because the machine thanked me for my order using my name, which it had gleaned from my credit card).

Of course, I began to overthink about this interaction with a machine instead of a person. Self-serve kiosks (and similar technologies) aren’t new by any means. In many grocery stores, they have self-checkout counters, and you can order practically anything you want online and you don’t even have to talk to the guy who delivers it to you because he rings the doorbell and runs away because (a) he’s afraid of your hysterical barking dog, or, more realistically, (b) he’s on a tight delivery schedule.

[As an aside: It’s not a new notion that many jobs could be eliminated by this technology. Even if Walmart replaces four of its regular checkouts with self-checkouts, it would still need one person to supervise and make sure the self-checkout machines are working properly and that nobody steals anything.** But still, that’s three jobs being eliminated. In a quasi–fast food restaurant like Panera, you could eliminate all the cashier positions and just have one person monitoring the kiosk while everyone else is in the back, invisibly preparing the food and sliding it out to the customer.]

I always hear that although we are the most connected society in history (because of the Internet, faster transportation, social media, etc.), we are also very isolated. It is entirely possible to work completely from home (via the Internet), order everything you need from afar (also via the Internet), and basically never leave the house. Obviously, this is incredibly convenient, but our biology dictates that we are social creatures. Whether we like to admit it or not, we all need some type of human interaction to be fulfilled (Skype, TeamSpeak, and social media don’t count). To cut yourself off is to make yourself miserable.

I know I’m probably making a big deal out of nothing, but sometimes it does seem as though with all our “progress,” we are forgetting what makes life fun and surprising. Sometimes it’s those little interactions with a cashier or with the greeter at Walmart or with that random person you see in the street that can make your day. Being isolated in front of a computer screen can sink you into a dark depression in such a gradual way that before you know it, you’re so used to being alone that you cannot bear the thought of any other alternative. You think you’re just fine, then you speak to a real-life person and realize how much you’re missing by not being present in the world.***

*I love the word kiosk. It sounds so nice when you say it.

**My brother works in a grocery store, and based on what he says, people are very skilled at stealing and would probably still do so no matter how many employees were watching.

***This post is more or less a warning to myself: don’t use the self-serve kiosk!

Guess I Must Be a Jerk

This “scientific” study says that ending text messages with a period makes you look like a jerk.

I’m kind of a noob when it comes to texting. I type 90+ words per minute, but I text at about 1 word per minute because it takes forever for me to peck at the keys on the screen. Because I spend so much effort typing out a single text message, I like to make sure it’s grammatically correct. I also like to be that annoying person who makes a point of using proper grammar and punctuation in texts just because no one else bothers to. So I guess I am a jerk. 🙂

However, I do agree that ending a very short message with a period seems cold. Like if you say “Thanks.”, it might come off as terse or sarcastic. That’s why I normally use an exclamation point with “Thanks” or similar kinds of words. Most people would probably use “thx” and not even bother with the period, which seems less rude for some reason.

If you really don’t want to be misconstrued via text, just call the person. Or better yet, talk to them face to face if you can. Then you don’t necessarily have to worry about all that pesky punctuation.